Tuesday, January 1, 2008

What to expect in 08

I swear to all of you that I actually did something tonight. I know that it looks really lame that I'm writing this at 1:41 am on what is now New Years day but things aren't always as they seem.

I have been in Illinois for a week and a half now. It's cold I don't like cold. Never have and now that I've had a taste of warm weather in the winter, I don't foresee myself moving back to a colder climate anytime soon. It would have to take a really good looking man (who is perfect of course and has a British, Irish, or Australian accent) to convince me to move to a place that gets a lot of snow. Just saying.

Yes snow. Beautiful but horrid snow. I like snow that sticks to every part of the ground but the roads. That kind of snow is a rare hybrid snow that you can only find in very well off neighborhoods. I'm not from one of those.

I'm from a small town southwest of Chicago. It used to be a farm town, but is quickly becoming the new up-and-coming place to live. I worked, went to church, and hung out for the last 6 years or so mainly in Aurora, IL (yes Wayne's World) and that is 30 minutes away from my hometown.

Like most people, I had a couple of options of how and with whom I wanted to ring in the New Year. I was going to try to hit both of my options in one night, but they were not close to each other and it had been snowing all day making the roads gross. I decided that I would only go to Aurora and usher in 08 with my IL small group.

In typical Midwest winter fashion, a 30 minute drive became a 60 min drive and because the land is so flat, it is next to impossible to see where the edge of the road is. The road and the fields become one big white blanket.

I don't like driving in the snow, it terrifies me. My first car was a Ford Taurus that handled terribly in the snow and I landed it in a ditch twice before I reached the age of 19. I'm a bit gun-shy because of this and tonight I was even more nervous because I was driving my parent's car. Heaven help me if I put the Honda Accord in ditch. If that happened, I think I would have called a taxi to take me to the airport 2 days ahead of time.

Nothing happened except for me losing a good quarter inch off of my molars from clenching my jaw so tightly. Just so you know I’ve never driven a car that handles better in the snow. Free promotion for Honda.

I knew that tonight was going to be great because these people are seriously some of the greatest people that I know. This small group was so instrumental in how I now view the world, people, community, and relationships. I learned how to be transparent and real by interacting with these people and honestly every time I'm with them, I think "This is what heaven must be like".

You all know that I'm not your typical party girl. I don't do well with large parties where I know few people. It feels fake to me and I don't tolerate fake well at all. I'm not good at small talk because honestly I never feel like people really care and that they are just talking because that's the thing to do. Half the time I don't feel like I care what they have to say either and it irritates me that I'm acting like I do. I really want to be a person that values people so much that I really do care what they are saying, but for now I don't want to act like I care when I don't. I don't like being humored and I doubt the person I'm talking to does either. I sound like a jerk I'm sure.

I'm also not really a drinker. It's not a principle thing for me, it's just that I haven't acquired a taste for most alcoholic beverages and I feel that if I don't like it, why should I make myself like it? I have no problem with people having a couple of beers but I'm perfectly happy not having anything. When I do have something, I can't drink very much because I fall asleep. Now that's what I call the life of the party.

So tonight I welcomed the fact that I knew almost everyone in the room intimately and they knew me. I definitely feel like I'm getting to that point in Nashville, but these people were in my life when I made the big decision to completely alter my life by changing careers and moving away from everyone. They encouraged the decision and I think that it's really interesting for them to see how it's all playing out. They actually were around when I didn't know that there was a decision to be made and I was struggling trying to figure out where my place was in this whole thing called life. Again they are incredible, incredible people that I look up to immensely.

Tonight the festivities took place at the Cochran's house. It's one of the coziest houses that I've ever been in on one of the most picturesque streets. We sat in their living room while eating food, telling stories, laughing, and of course having deep discussions. This group amazes me in that they talk about the deepest things so naturally without being pretentious at all. I personally don't think that I'm deep, but I love listening to them discuss human nature, theology, and life. People's opinions vary, but the discussion never gets heated and differing opinions are welcomed and considered. You think I'm making this up, but I'm not. Like I said, heaven on earth.

The warmth of the night was made even more complete by the Christmas tree in the corner, the fire in the fireplace, and the beveled glass windows looking out onto the snowy street. It was absolutely perfect. We (well actually Mike) even roasted chestnuts over the "open fire".

I left around 1 because the roads were bad and my car would be towed a 2. This story would not be complete without a stupid Erin story. Although I lived in Illinois for 25 years prior to moving, I somehow failed to realize that wearing Chucks on a day when we were expecting 4 inches of snow (it turned out to be more than that) was not a good idea. I also wore a lighter jacket and forgot to bring gloves. Once I got to my car, snow had covered all the windows and under the snow there was a layer of ice. Snowed filled my shoes, my hands froze as I scrapped my windows and because I parked next to the curb, I had to climb into a pile of snow to scrape off the passenger's side window. As I was driving home my toes were numb and at one point I actually had to take off my shoe because I was getting that bad tingling feeling in my right foot. Brilliant Erin, brilliant.

Wow. I'm sure that I could write another 3 more pages of thoughts, but I won't bore you with that.

So what to expect in 08. I can't even imagine what God has in store for me. I don't know how anything could top what happened in 07. In January 07 I had absolutely no clue that I would be visiting these friends over the holidays because I would not longer be living in the same state. I never thought that I would move farther than 30 minutes away from these people yet alone 9 hours. I didn't think that I would not be doing x-ray. I didn't think that I would be making new friends. My closest friends I had been friends with for 8 years. It is absolutely amazing this year to look back at last year and years before that and see how everything leads up to right now. I always wanted to know where God wanted me "right now". There was no way that I could see what he was preparing me for and I can now totally see that this was a prepared situation. If certain things didn't happen to me and if certain people weren't placed in my life, I would not be in Nashville. There is no way that you would have gotten to me to do what I'm doing and be where I'm at if these things didn't happen. I'm glad that I'm in Nashville. I feel completely at peace there. I love it now and I can see glimpses of how God is using me there. I just ask that you pray for me that I continue to be open to God's leading and that I don't try to do it all on my own. God bless you in 2008. God only knows what is going to happen.